(Verse 1) On the first day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: A tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 2) On the second day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 3) On the third day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 4) On the fourth day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 5) On the fifth day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Five golden toupees! Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 6) On the sixth day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Six Dems a-scheming, Five golden toupees! Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 7) On the seventh day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Seven walls a-building, Six Dems a-scheming, Five golden toupees! Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 8) On the eighth day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Eight MAGA rallies, Seven walls a-building, Six Dems a-scheming, Five golden toupees! Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 9) On the ninth day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Nine golf trips playing, Eight MAGA rallies, Seven walls a-building, Six Dems a-scheming, Five golden toupees! Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 10) On the tenth day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Ten covfefes trending, Nine golf trips playing, Eight MAGA rallies, Seven walls a-building, Six Dems a-scheming, Five golden toupees! Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 11) On the eleventh day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Eleven judges frowning, Ten covfefes trending, Nine golf trips playing, Eight MAGA rallies, Seven walls a-building, Six Dems a-scheming, Five golden toupees! Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.

(Verse 12) On the twelfth day of indictments, my lawyers said to me: Twelve lawyers billing, Eleven judges frowning, Ten covfefes trending, Nine golf trips playing, Eight MAGA rallies, Seven walls a-building, Six Dems a-scheming, Five golden toupees! Four lawsuits pending, Three fake news, Two pardoned cronies, And a tweetstorm to distract from the spree.